29th Birthday. What I've been learning about Control Issues

When I was young I wanted a lot of approval. I've always had control issues, but it wasn't until I ended up in the epic social power struggle with forces greater than myself that I learned it's pretty pointless to continue aspiring to do anything you can't successful do yourself without outer interference.

What do I mean by that? Simple, I don't control whether or not publishing houses and the internet react to and whether or not any of them want to support me or my work. That's a non-controllable area.

There's no point in making "decisions" about things you want to have power over (competition, your fame, sales, publisher acceptance), when there are things here and now that I can control (namely what I upload, scan, and draw and write down on a piece of paper or computer screen. Whatever you see me design and draw, that's one thing I have complete and utter control over: My creative vision at its most essential and basic. No one controls my artwork but me.). My originality has inspired knock offs (mostly UNINSPIRED), but at the same time, I'm not concerned about copycat artists. I don't control copycat artists. I only control my own two hands and what I put down on the page, blog, or word processor software. So from now on, I'm only focusing on what I can control, not what I can't. I'm focusing ONLY on where I HAVE POWER, not where I'm power-LESS (competing websites and shows, pretty much ANY corporation)

Coming to terms with my control issues is something I didn't learn till I was older and the internet had been around for a while. I've always had a certain amount of my own power, but it's increased recently, and there's enough of it at my disposal to make me feel secure in MY OWN Decisions nowadays.

Out of all the Power in the world and Billions of Control Points...I've seized about 40 points or so out of Raw Will Power Alone, which is actually more than most people, but a grain of sand compared to KKKorporate Amerikkka.

Still, with the internet's rise, it's hard to find someone nowadays who DOESN'T have access to Control. It's not really a matter of how much Power and Control you Have. It's really about how you USE whatever Control you DO HAVE. Unless you work in Hollywood (which I probably never will) or Silicon Valley. You're genuine level of Raw Control will be limited. And because it IS so limited (and limiting), as opposed to using raw energy and work ethic, is even WORTH keeping tabs and points on when you have such a small amount of it in reality? Probably not.