The Future of Creative Media Distribution - I have a DREAM!!!!

Mediums and the Old Utilitarian Distribution

Movies: Theatrical, Home Box Office, VHS, DVD (Amazon), Cable TV, Best Buy,  Borders

Books: Amazon, Borders, Bookstores

Comics, Comic Books: Comic Book Shop, Bookstores, Amazon, Borders

TV: Television Set

Anime: TV, Bookstores,  Borders, Cons, Best Buy

Music: Radio, Record Stores, Concerts, CD Players, Walkmans-Discmans, MP3s

New Utilitarianism Distribution

·       Google

·       YouTube

·       Pandora

·       Netflix

·       Amazon

·       Kindle

·       Amazon Studios

·       Hulu

·       Cartoon Network

·       Roku

·       Scribd

·       DVR

·       My inventions

My manuscripts, comics, Books, Journals, video files and DVDs

One day a profitable outlet of distribution will emerge in the next 50-70 years for people like me, and submitting your work to millions will be as easy as making one single upload, or uploading a single PDF manuscript document, or uploading one video file. Like what YouTube, Kindle, Scribd, and Amazon Studios are doing now. Only the next generation of websites will be on an even grander, more monetization-savvy scale.

The key words to look out for in terms of content are:

·       Internationally Distributed Content

·       Uploaded Content

·       Monetized Content

·       Pay Per Click Advertising (Banner Ads and Adsense, etc.)

I have a big stack of projects in my house. One big pile of projects: Comics, Short Stories, Daily Logs, Essays, Art Books, Scripts. DVDs, and PDF documents.

I have faith that one day in the near future there will be international uploading sites with international audience. You know, YouTubes for each of those manuscript, file, and project genres, where I can get millions upon billions of hits for one manuscript or comic, or a lot more, and yet still be able to monetize my original content with ads, or license it to Hollywood and L.A., and let other people in six continents have user access to it as an audience with low subscription fees.

I have a Dream! That I can Monetize the Content I Have Lying Around My House!

Millennials and the Internet as it relates to Professional Success

Older generations grew up in a different atmosphere than we millennials do and did. Baby Boomer and Gen X generation artists and storytellers who have made  brands out of their names and works say your Jhonen Vasquezes, Todd McFarlanes, Stan Lees, Jim Lees, George Lucases, and Tim Burtons, had to achieve the bulk of their success, be it animation or comic book work, the old Fashioned way, WITH NO Social media or internet technology. With mostly just word processors, art supplies, wealthy connections, and agents and producers they submitted their work to. Well that, or they snuck onto a Hollywood studio lot illegally and set up office. Looking at you Spielberg.....

One interesting development I've noticed is we're all going to get to watch how the Millennial Generation of Entertainers, Media Tycoons, Brands, Auteurs, and Creator Writers and Artists, and filmmakers and broadcasters, ultimately achieve social, financial, and material success WITH the aid of the internet, but ALSO starting with what is often nothing and no money. It's going to be interesting to see how the power of the internet generation both helps, aids, hassles, and hinders the millennial generation of storytellers, entrepreneurs, filmmakers, designers, and artists. This generation will have to work hard too, just like previous ones if they want to really get anywhere in this world, but in many ways my generation has more utilitarian based resources that can aid young people pathway to a career, money, status, and success.

THIS generation of young adults, the current one, is growing up in a different world, with different challenges and advantages than their predecessors, and will be inheriting this world within the worldwide shadow of the Internet and social media.

It will be interesting to watch this generational, social, economical, and technological shift and seeing the hypothetical torch passed to the first major generation of young adults of THIS Century and Millennium. The Millennials of the 21st Century and early 2000s.

How to Draw Comics-&-Manga Fighting.....

There are many tricks and techniques to drawing fighting, such as compositing, choreography, action poses, foreshortening, speed lines, and layering.

But here's a trick I picked up with OUT the aid of tutorials are books, a trick that will make drawing action in a sequence that much easier:

All motion in comic books is freeze frame static motion. That means, its not animation. Nothing moves. The point is to create the ILLUSION OF MOTION with static and motionless, or to put it in a more obvious way, movie paused and frozen in place static imagery.

No matter how intense your punches and kicks, and sword swipes, and gun shots, and weapon and limb movements, no matter how you want your motion to look, there's no way to avoid making it conform to what I like to call, 

"The Pause" or "The Freeze Frame Effect". All motion in comic books is and looks frozen in time, no matter how bloody, violent, ballistic, fast, blurred, intense, speed liney, or frenetic and frantic it's conceptual motion is. The idea behind the art is moving, not the drawing and art itself. The drawing will never move itself. The drawing IS ALWAYS FREEZE FRAMED AND FROZEN! 

I think part of why I had so much trouble figuring it out was that I tended to watch a lot of animation and storyboards for animation, NOT AS MANY COMICS. Animation IS motion and timing.

Comics is static, stationary, freeze frame motion, not matter how many speed lines, special effects (like flames and smoke) or weapons it uses. The final panel still has to be a freeze framed static image with no real motion on a flat page.

Never Give Up! - About Comics and Manga Artists in America

It's always the timid ones.

EVERY TIME you're on a manga discussion forum on some website, the topic comes up, by some young middle school or high school aged kid, who obviously has good intentions, but is terrible at forseeing how haters will react to their queries online.

"I'm an artist, and I want to draw manga. How do I do this? Will the Japanese fans and pros accept me"

To which often they get a LOT of COWARDLY response from incognito, anonymous Japanese and America OEL American manga hating fans who think they're GOD'S GIFT TO American FANDOM!

"American manga sucks! They yell at you. "And you suck for attempting to draw it!" "Give up now!" "You're an imposter. You'll never draw real manga, because your not Japanese and don't speak Japanese"

And if you hang out with bottom feeder hater LOSERS online like this, they would end up  being right. If you listen to that nasty brand of prejudice, hate, racism, cynicism, and pessimism, you never WILL draw your own manga. Who knows, they might even convince you to blow your brains across your computer screen with a 45., too! I mean, who knows! All things are possible on the internet, right? Well, GIVING UP ON YOUR CAREER sure is!

Why in the WORLD would anyone talk to assholes THAT BIG for advice. It baffles me.

You don't NEED THEIR encouragement or ADVICE! Not to draw what you want.

You need to DRAW SOME Manga already. Draw some thumbnails, then keep tracing, erasing drawing over, and inking them, until you're happy with them. And keep drawing comics of manga until you're happy with your progress, then keep going. BUT if you're comic sucks, you need to realize and admit it if you're honestly not happy with your own work.  And KEEP working on it until your happy with it. 

Repeat this process and  technique until DEAD.

Never consult young teenagers online on whether you should draw manga, or HOW you should draw manga. If they had ANY sense in them and WEREN'T online hypocrites who secretly hate anyone who works up the nerve to draw things they can't (in this case, manga in Japan), of COURSE THEIR GONNA TELL YOU NEGATIVE THINGS like "GIVE UP" and "YOU'LL NEVER MAKE IT". 

Because they GAVE UP ON THEMSELVES AND THEIR CAREERS a long time ago, and they secretly hope EVERYONE ELSE, including you will do just the same. 

Never consult random people on anime websites who never actually attempt drawing comics themselves and seem like they have a serious axe to grind. They will say the most extreme, racist, and hateful anti-American sentiment, all in an elaborate effort to get in your head and keep you from doing your job.

Kindle's Comics Publisher Software is RIGHT THERE, as are Lulu and Create Space. They're WAITING for people with finished comics book and series, including manga artists from America. My manga-comic sold 64 copies there. But do you really think that would have been a possible opportunity for me if I LISTENED to the anti-OEL peanut armchair sports critic gallery, and given up. Why would I want THOSE guys to have the upper hand in the publishing industry, with their snotty culturally elitist attitude. 

I think part of the problem is, a young artists insecurities of working on a developing comic book medium, entirely by his or her self, on their own, in isolation in your parents house or wherever, you get lonely, you get insecure, you  get humbled by what other artists are doing that is vastly superior in artistic design and quality. This isn't about them. The other artists. It's about you. And one of the biggest mistakes you can make is to ask around in comments sections online for advice. You'll get a bunch of negative comments from kids mostly, who have no industry or mentorship experience with anything.

Just remember, you can always take lessons with me on how to write scripts and draw comics if you want to.

Contact me at spindack@gmail.com for details if you're interested in learning comics.

Myers Briggs Personality Analysis of Famous People I know or have heard of....

In case you didn't know, I'm a big fan of the Myers-Briggs Personality Temperament Sorter System.

Here's a list of more obscure (but still nonetheless famous) personalities and their majority temperaments

Myers Briggs

Celebrity Types

NT - NF - SP - SJ

Rational - Idealist - Artisan - Guardian

Joseph M. Alberts - Rational / Idealist / Artisan
Nicole Cook (GF) - Artisan
Amanda M (other GF) - Rational / Idealist
Most of the the kids in my gifted middle school class (Rational / Artisan / Idealist)

Glendis Sorrell (father) - Idealist

Mary Gaynor (mother) - Rational

Thomas Romain - Artisan / Rational / Idealist

Steve Blum - Artisan - Guardian - Idealist

Savin Yeatman Eiffell - Rational / Idealist / Artisan

Jhonen Vasquez - Artisan / Rational, NT / SP

Osamu Tezuka - Artisan / Rational / Idealist
George Lucas - Artisan / Rational / Idealist / Guardian (little bit of all four, in his work)

Ted Turner - Artisan / Rational / Guardian NT / SP

Bill Gates - Rational

Larry Page - Rational

Mark Zuckerberg - Rational
Barack Obama - Artisan / Guardian / Idealist

Steve Jobs - Rational / Artisan

Seth MacFarlane - Artisan / Guardian / Rational

Yoshiyuki Tomino - Rational / Artisan / Idealist

Dave Sim - Artisan / Rational / Idealist / Guardian

Todd McFarlane - Artisan / Rational / Guardian

Katsuhiro Otomo - Artisan / Rational / Idealist
Leonardo Da Vinci - Artisan / Rational
Shakespeare - Artisan / Rational

Scott McCloud - Rational / Artisan

HP Lovecraft - Artisan / Rational

Edgar Allen Poe - Artisan

Aaron McGruder - Artisan / Rational / Idealist

Dave Willis - Artisan / Rational
Kurt Cobain - Artisan
Les Claypool - Artisan / Rational
Maynard James Keenan - Artisan / Rational / Idealist
Alex Grey - Rational / Artisan / Idealist
Ken Wilber - Rational / Idealist
Marilyn Manson - Artisan / Rational
Trent Reznor - Artisan / Rational / Idealist
Thom Yorke - Artisan / Idealist / Rational
Rivers Cuomo - Artisan / Rational
Tim Burton - Idealist / Artisan / Rational
John Woo - Idealist / Artisan / Rational
Quentin Tarantino - Artisan / Guardian / Rational
Cartoon Network / Adult Swim - Artisan / Rational / Idealist
Anime - Artisan / Rational / Idealist
Music - Artisan
Science - Rational
Religion, Mysticism, Spirituality, World - Idealist
Literature - Rational / Artisan (Hybrid of both)
America - Guardian / Rational
Radio - Artisan / Guardian
TV - Artisan / Guardian

Disclaimer: These are mere hypothetical psychological estimates, based on data I've gathered from studying these things, people, and names, based on behavioral and characteristic analysis. For the topics, like religion, science, or anime, etc, I based my assessment on the temperaments of the majority temperament for each category. Hardly anyone is ONLY ONE of those four temperaments, but many people do have dominant traits, as are revealed through speech, recurring elements, identifiable behavior traits. Read at your own discretion. 

To cite one example of what I'm referring to, not a lot of people associate the Guardian temperament with artistry and creativity. Many people associate it with conservative politics, incredibly tough temperaments (such as people with a Taurus Zodiac Sign, and/or artists or writers whose values are more grounded in the old fashioned way of doing things. I know some might disagree,  but the descriptions for the Guardian Myers Briggs Temperament and the Taurus Zodiac sign share many values. I should know, there are a lot of them in my own adoptive family). Etc., etc. Art and True creativity tend to come from both Artisans AND Idealists much of the time, such as entertainers like Thom Yorke and Tim Burton (NF / SP). Etc., etc.

Fun With Myers Briggs.....

As it turns out, I'm not only multiracial, mystical, and ingenious, but Half INTP / Half INFP, or as some on personality cafe call it, IN*P, meaning I'm 50% F 50% T, because my (birth) father was a multiracial Eurasian F, and my (birth) mother was an American white.

And as it turns out, I was adopted into a family made up entirely of White Caucasian American STJ's.

"Lucky" me....(sighs)

Starting this September, Appy Pie is implementing a new pay system for developers.....

Knowing my luck I'll probably get DICKED OVER by Appy Pie yet again with some B.S. cop-out curveball like "Oh, sorry this doesn't include Flash video like our previous program! So solly!"

I BET EE DO! I BET EE DO!

Plots R. Us

Story Outlines 

Hot Off The Presses

·        A 40 year old man begins using a social networking site to meet people because he is lonely, from living alone for so long. He takes an online DNA test for 23andme.com, and meets distant relatives through the site. One of his relatives continues contacting him by phone and email after introducing himself. When the man, Jack asks what business his cousin Tony is in, Tony says "Sales" and acquisitions. Tony suggests they meet each other in person. They hold their first meet up at the local McDonalds, and the encounter goes well. They head back to Jack's home to bond as family, and Tony says he needs to give Jack a gift he has. The "gift" turns out to be a wad of 50 $100 bills bound by a small rubber band. Tony tosses the money on the single seat couch and says take it, it's yours for bein' beautiful. Jack isn't sure if he should accept this money, as he doesn't know where Tony got it. Oh, you know, says Tony. Business investments, sales and acquisitions. Tony says he works for a "marketing company", and Nevermind where it came from, it's my gift to you. I do top notch work. The meet up concludes with Tony leaving Jacks house. They hug, and bid each other adieu.

·        A man has an appointment with his therapist. And his therapist kidnaps him at gunpoint in mid therapy session. The therapist wants his patient to help him kill both their wives, as the therapist is a psychopathic misogynist and hates women in general. They get into the car, and when they get to the therapist's neighborhood, and his wife is on the sidewalk, at which point the therapist attempts to run her over with his car, but the patient grabs the gun and takes control of the wheel while the therapist is driving really fast, causing the car to swerve and flip over into a car crash, causing both men to get knocked unconscious. The patient comes to before the therapist does but only by a few minutes, but that's enough time to escape the car, where the therapists wife wants to know what happened, at which point the patient warns the therapist's wife the therapist is planning to murder her and his own wife in a criminal plot, and he's got a gun. The patient takes the therapist's gun, and aims it at the therapist as he comes to. The patient rescues the therapist from the car before it catches fire and explodes. The patient calls 911 on his cell phone, and the police arrive and arrest the therapist, apprehending him and arrest him for attempted murder. The therapists wife falls in love with the patient for saving her life, and they form a relationship, but decide not to take it too seriously. And that's how the patient met the therapists wife: When her husband decided to attempt killing her by running her over with a car.

Lee Is Me - And now, Introducing my most fascinating (and autobiographical character) YET! Lee Wonders: Adventurer!

 Lee Wonders: Adventurer
An Introduction

• Here we meet our main protagonist Lee Wonders, Adventurer and Warrior, as he goes on a Journey like None Other Before It.
• Lee's skin is of a copper pigment, and he has short straight black hair with a stern face, and wears a hat. He's always wearing sports tee shirts and khaki pants. He has muscular forearms, and a thin demeanor. A stern yet compassionate face. He mostly doesn't smile. Always analyzing and gauging how he's going to escape one situation to arrive at another. He's a young tan skinned thin muscular hybrid of Gordan Freeman and Indiana Jones. He doesn't eat much, but the food he does it is incredibly unhealthy. In his journey, he indulges in a lot of eating and often eats sweets, snack food, and fast food. Though he is a bit on the meek and timid side in a normal setting, out in "The Wild" he becomes a different person. More of a leader and adventurer, more courageous when threatened, and calm under pressure. He's 6 feet tall, and 24 years old.
  
• The story starts with a scenic nowhere...Lee Wonders lives in an apartment in Maine, in the United States, alone. He's single, but he views it as a "necessary evil" to keep himself free of the materialism and chauvinism his country is so rooted in. He doesn't own a car because he can't afford one. But overall, at the beginning of our story, our hero, Mr. Wonders lives a life not unlike many lives...Until...Adventure calls out to him and his life is endangered when strangers start attacking and threatening him in public and he's forced to defend himself against Evil Forces that pursue him across the four corners of the earth. They want to steal his soul, for he is the last surviving member of a lineage of Souls Destined for Adventure. This puts him within the reach of danger at all times. There is never a moment of peace and quiet or safety for Lee. But as the story progresses he learns how to deal with this form of Adventure Stress caused by the people in his life. 
• There are a lot of thunderstorms surrounding his location, so he's indoors a lot. The storms symbolize revelation, and only visit him when the spirits do. This comes to be known as The Gray Winds. 
• About The Gray Winds...
• Lee's Background Story or "History": He was born an orphan, but was eventually taken in with a kind normal family who never questioned his origin or viewed him out of the ordinary. They respected him as family members, and sheltered him a lot when he was young, allowing him to be shy and withdrawn. He has an I.Q. of 160, making him technically a scientific genius, but he finds science and technology to be more of an invasive nuisance than any kind of a savior. Lee studied martial arts growing up, and had a taste more for living life than talking about it, partially due to his own selective mutism.
• Lee enjoys living in his new apartment, until someone dies right outside his front door, and members of the Illuminati that wants to steal his soul, set his apartment ablaze, forcing him out on the street until he is rescued by  the FBI that's there to combat the bad secret organizations, who puts up room and  board for him, and relocates to a house in Europe as part of the Witness Protection Program. 

JAY - DAYS IN THE LIFE OF - "John Lasseter"

Int. Disney Institute - Day

John Lasseter is making a rare public appearance at Disneyworld in Orlando, Florida. He is sitting behind a table with his assistants. A long line has formed, and everyone is patiently and politely waiting for their turn to get John Lasseter's autograph and talk to him. Joseph is up next.

Joseph

Hi there. Toy Story 2 kicked ass!

John LAsseter

(looking a little wide eyed and started by the comment, Lasseter quickly regains his zen like calm and cool composure)

Oh, I see. You liked the Toy Story 2 didja?

Joseph

Yeah! (laughs) I loved it. It's a great film. So what's your opinion on the whole "2-D Animation vs. 3-D Animation debate"?

John Lasseter

Well, you see, each one has it's own specialties. It has a lot to do with the textures and the feel of the whole thing.

JAY - DAYS IN THE LIFE OF - "Anime"

Ext. - Jay's House - Day

Open Shot Wide, as we see Jay's house from the exterior, no cars in driveway. It is a quiet weekday afternoon in suburban nowhere. This could be any neighborhood.

Cut to:

Int. - Jay's house - Day

The camera floats around the interior of Jay's house as it closes in on the source of all the activity, Jay in his secondary home office.

There are books and papers and magazines scattered to nearly all corners of Jay's Home Office.

We then establish a camera shot of Jay himself, hard at work on his computer, researching and navigating the labyrinth of the online world. The screen has a peculiar neon glow, as windows and menu bars pop up and scroll across the screen

Jay is checking his email.

Computer Voice

You, Have, Two, Messages.

Jay

Cool! Somebody contacted me!

Computer Voice

Message, from, Producer, of Anime, Studio.

Jay

Finally! The higher ups are interested in my ideas. I should respond to this

Jay clicks the respond button, and begins typing email to Anime Producer.

And now (in the next to upcoming scripts) is the scenes where I get autobiographical....

To be published, soon

Happy Screenwriter Day...Today's Script: "Mister X: Vigilante Days"

Downtown District - Philadelphia, Pennsylvania - Night

Jack Knight and Mister X are loitering on the Downtown Philadelphia Streets

Jack

DeviantART? Sorry. Never heard of it. Are there a lot of man hating little girls there who hate actual literature by any chance?

Mister X

Not sure. Lemme check. WHOA That's a whole lotta menstruation!

Jack

Hmmm. Remind me never to go there, unless I need something to jerk off to.

Mister X

You betcha. I hear the girl that runs that website is a real flaming BITCH. Does she have a police record yet.

Jack

No, but she will. Isn't she the hacker-total-stalker type? Who likes to fabricate information to suit her neo-feminist-fetishes purpose?

Mister X

As records would indicate, yes. Yeah, let's ARGUE ONLINE summore. That's really gonna solve things.

Jack

Naturally!

At that moment, a 14 year old high school fangirl walks up to Jack and Mister X in the urban Philadelphia streets. She has a script in her hands.

14-Year-Old

Hey, I love you and your work, Jack Knight. Who are you standing next to? He's not a pervert is he. I'm a screenwriter TOO all of a sudden! I wrote a rant about the evils of rape. Wanna read it???

Jack

No.

Mister X

FUCK no. Get lost with that RAPE shit. Go see a the-rapist.

Jack and Mr. X

(High Five, follow by Beavis and Butt-Head laughter)

Mister X

(pulls beretta M1923 out from under his trenchcoat, aims it at her face)

How bout you GET THE FUCK OUT of here with that stupid "I hate everything but Bleach" shit. Thanks. Name's Mister X, by the way! Tell your friends!

14-Year Old

(Runs away quickly, sprinting and crying like someone even younger than her own age)

Mooooooommm!! Mister X pointed a Gun at me!

Jack

Girls. So sensitive, riiiight.

Mister X

I NO RITE!? EL OH EL! By the way, you're writing is terrible, Jack. Just atrocious. I could do a lot better if I weren't such a lazy Asian.

Jack

Oh is it now?

Mister X

Nah, I'm just yankin' ya dick. You're awesome. And so is my Beretta!

Jack

Mos definitely!

Mister X

Nothing beats that good old fashioned feeling of cold, hefty steel of a gun in your hand. That feeling of raw power. You never forget your first time holding a gun.

Jack

Well said, buddy. You never do. G-Got anything to do today?

Mister X

Nah, just wasting time. How about you.

Jack

Well, I am writing the "Great American Novel", but it's slow sometimes. The writing process is slow.

Mister X

I know what you mean. Writing can be a pain in the butt sometimes. I'm not a natural writer like you. You have more luck with it than I tend to. It's parta why I like you so much. I still want you to autograph my art book I have over in New Jersey.

Jack

I'd be happy to. ANYTHING for a FAN!

(both laugh)

Fans. Huh-huh-huh

(continual laughter)

Mister X

(Sarcastically)

What's gotten into you all of a sudden anyway? Signing a book for a fan. Taking time out of your day to talk to lifelong friends. "What is WRONG with you Jack!! TMZ is right. Yer, like, a total NERD. Like, TOTALLY!".

JACK

Ho yew. You and your silly GUN. Now you're starting to sound like my parents. Scary right? You just always say the Darndest Things! Glad to see you haven't changed, me amigo.

 

Mister X

You know what. You haven't changed all that much either, Jack. You're one of the few people I DON'T WANT to shoot. And I'm a gangster. I'd shoot just about everybody and everything that moves like any good gangster, if I could. I gotta long list.

JACK

Oh I know you do. Nothing wrong with being angry and violent, and wanting to KILL THE WORLD. It's great stress relief. It truly is.

Mister X

I don't see why not. I LOVE the Healing Power of Anger

JACK

Me too. Gotta love that shit. S-Say, did you hear that new Beastie Boys Album. The one they made with Adam Yauch before he died?

Mister X

To the 5 Burroughs??

JACK

Put Dat SHIT Back On Dah Shelf! I dish MAGIC like a MA-GICH-UN! Check Che-Check Check Ah Check It Out!

Mister X

Wha-What WHAT WHAT's IT ALL ABOUT

Jack

Let's turn this mothafuckin PARTY OUT!!!

MISTER X

Fuckin' A. Awesome.

JACK

Damn straight! Fuckin MASTAPIECE! Masterful lyricism. Fuckin can't get enough of it. Almost as good as killin people. ALMOST.

Mister X

(laughs)

Almost.

Jack

ALL-MOST. Say you-you wanna get something to eat somewhere.

Mister X

You know, I was thinking the same thing. I am gettin pretty freaking hungry.

JACK

Let's go to Big Burger. Let's get some lunch.

Mister X

Sounds good to me.

Cut to:

EXT. Local Library parking lot - Day

A black car pulls up into the driveway parking space at the local Philadelphia library. The building is surprisingly small. It's a new library, with a dull architectural aesthetic to it. Nothing too fancy or old fashioned.

Int. - Mister X's Car - Day

Mr. X and Jack are sitting in the front seats with fast food wrappers lying everywhere.

Mister X

(Burps)

Good meal! Here Jack, I'll throw the garbage away. I'm keeping my gun. Just in case.

JACK

Library's don't have metal detectors, do they.

Mister X

COURSE not. It's a library, not a public high school full of black kids.

JACK

(laughs)

So why are we at the library, X?

Mister X

Educmacation! Education. I've been feeling a bit, how shall I say, empty and spiritually lost lately. I think a book or two about God might lift my spirit.

The two men exit the car.

Cut To:

Int. Philadelphia Library - 2nd Floor - Day

Skip ahead in time. The library has a handful of people in it, it's not noisy at all. We see two men at a table covered in books. Almost all the books have the word "God" in the title.

JACK

Uh, look X, I'm all for finding God, but don't you think you're going a bit overboard on your research?

Mister X

What do you mean?

JACK

I mean on this table alone, you've got like 50 books about God. How you gonna find the time to read all of this.

Mister X

Oh I'll find the time. I may be a thug, but even thugs make time for God. For without God, we are All Lost.

JACK

I suppose so. I'm more of a philosophy man myself.

Mister X

Like Nietzsche, Kant, Sartre, Schopenhauer, Hegel, Heidegger, and the like.

JACK

Yup.

Mister X

You an atheist?

JACK

Used to be. Not so much lately.

MISTER X

Hey brother, that's okay. We all believe what we believe. People have a right to believe what they believe....Okay, I've done MY homework. Let's get going.

JACK

I was hoping you'd say that.

Cut to

Ext. Library Parking Lot - Day

We see the black car leaving the lot, off on its merry way, and back on the road as it drives away. The car goes into a driving montage as it rolls down the highways and expressways of Downtown Philadelphia, just cruising.

Int. Cruising Car - Evening

Mister X

Know what time it is, Jack?

JACK

What?

Mister X

Bounty Huntin' Time. Time to catch a criminal.

Mister X then switches on the Police RF scanner he ordered from the internet and had installed in his dashboard.

[POLICE RADIO]

All subjects, be on alert, we have a 421 situation happening at Bremmen Avenue Motel. Suspect has already killed two people with a gun and is not looking to cooperate with authorities

JACK

You know what this means.

Mister X and Jake

Bounty Hunting Time!!!!!

Cut to

Ext. Bremmen AVENUE Motel - Afternoon

We see a man on the second floor of a two story balcony, looking quite threatening. He is covered in blood, and armed with a machine gun. A wannabe Rambo, but uglier. Police cars are parked across the lot. SWAT Helicopters are hovering overhead. He begins firing at police with his submachine gun.

Gunman

Yeah YA LIKE THAT DO YA!!!!! YOU WANT A PIECE AH THIS!!! I'll KILL ALL of YOU BASTARDS!!!!

A car sneaks up on the scene, from the opposite direction of the police. The black car approaches from behind the front side of the motel. It's Jack and Mr. X. They get out of the car. They walk to the back of Mr. X's car and open the trunk, which is filled with a hidden arsenal. A stockade of shotguns, machine guns, handguns, grenades, and ammunition.

Mister X

(muttering silently)

Let's do this thing.

Cut To:

Gunman

I'm gonna kill ALL THE BITCHES UP IN THIS MOTHERFUCKER, you fuckin PIGS!!!! Don't test me. I'm so bad I bet you couldn't even TOUCH me. I'm gonna, I'm gonna...

A grenade lands 10 feet away, but before the gunman can do anything, the grenade ignites, sending the man flying as it explodes, destroying the left half of the motel, igniting into smoke, flame, and fumes.

Gunman

(now on floor, covered in blood)

Ah Gahd!!! NO! SHIT!!

MISTER X

(lurking across the street in shopping plaza parking lot, to Jack)

We got im'! Before the police did

The gunman turns around to look in the opposite direction, half dead, only to see Mister X has taken him by surprise, nearly annihilating him.

Gunman

Mother. Mo-ther. F-Fuck-kers. I'll. Getch. Yoo. If it's the

(vomits blood over charred body)

Last thing. I. Do.

The gunman at the motel then crawls toward the edge of the balcony. He spots Jack and Mister X, and they too know he's spotted them. He aims his submachine gun at them, and opens fire.

Mister X to Jack

Oh SHIT! He's firing back!!! Get DOWN!!!!

Jack and Mr. X duck and cover behind a corner of the building, crouching as bullets go flying in their direction. Mister X hides from  the gunman's sight for a moment as windows shatter, and bullet holes crowd the parking lot.

Mister X pauses clutching his submachine gun, then fires upon the gunman as bullets rain down on him returning fire. It's a war of bullets and shrapnel. Whoever connects with his target first will win. Mister X aims one final time, very cautiously, very carefully, and fires the winning shot, blowing the gunmans head clean off. The gunman's head explodes into a million pieces, making the Balcony Gunman drop his gun, and fall down dead, spraying the balcony with blood, as his body becomes a lifeless, headless corpse, as he then stumbles over to the balcony railing, trips, and his body falls one story down to the ground splattering the pavement.

Police Speakers

Subject is hit and down, I repeat subject is HIT AND DOWN!!!!

Swat Team Chief

GO GO GO!!! Get those civilians and clear the area!!! He's DEAD! SUBJECT IS DEAD.

Police officer

But who shot him? Was it one of us?

Before anyone can see who took out the gunman, Mister X and Jack have vanished from the back alley parking lot, almost like ninjas and are long gone. They've vanished before being noticed by the authorities.

Black car is now driving on the freeway listening to a news report about their exploits. "But who is the mystery vigilante who killed the hostile gunman?"

JACK

Awww yeah! We too a guy out and made the news. We're fuckin HEROES! I guess we're vigilantes.

MISTER X

Yup.

JACK

You did the real work though, X. You made the killshot.

MISTER X

YOU KNOW IT.

They high five eachother, and drive off into the sunset on Route 66.

Cut to:

INT. Philadelphia PD HQ - Police CHIEF's OFFICE

Police chief Martin

Dammit! WHAT. THE. FUCK!!! My men can't even take out a single spick gunman, and these YAHOO vigilantes take him out with ONE SHOT??!!! WHO THE FUCK IS this GUY. FIND HIM!!! I want his BALLS delivered in a UPS truck to my front desk, and I want it done YESTERDAY. I will NOT be made a fool of. That- That VIGILANTE made a fucking JOKE out of my men, the Philadelphia PD, out there. UNNACCEPTABLE!

Underling

But sir! All the media is in support of them. They're saying things like "God bless the Vigilante!"

POLICE CHIEF MARTIN

I don't CARE! They made a FOOL of me! I won't have it! FIND THEM!!!

(smashes coffee cup on desk and strokes his brown chubby face and brown musutache)

I'm a screenwriter. I like to write screenplays for Action Movies only I get to see. Today I'll be playing the Bad Guy. Scene 1: "Hostage"

Joe walks into the room where his mother is standing. He pulls out a .45 from underneath his coat, walks up to his mother, and places it against her temple. He cocks the gun, fully loaded.

Joe

Hey, MOM. You know, I'm not digging the scene here. How about we go for a little DRIVE.

Joe's Mom

What?! Why are you putting a gun to my head??

JOE

Shut up! Would you like to DIE, or would you like to go for a car ride?

Joe's Mom

Puh-Please, don't shoot me.

JOE

Then do what I tell you. We're going for a drive.

Cut to:

Gun Driving Car Scene. 

I did NOT CAUSE Webcomics Nation to Go Under

I REPEAT. I did NOT cause webcomics nation to GO UNDER!

Seriously, don't blame me...

Now because of this blonde mop that's on top
and this fucked up head that I've got, I've gone pop?
The underground just spunned around and did a 360
Now these kids diss me and act like some big sissies
"Oh, he just did some shit with Missy,
so now he thinks he's too big to do some shit with MC Get-Bizzy"

My Favorite 90s/2000s Alternative Rock Bands of All Time

Best Alternative Rock Music Acts of the 90s and 2000s

(Fuck Ranking Systems)

Ranked by (get this) An Actual Musician (Drummer). Yaaaay!!!!

·        Nirvana

·        Primus

·        They Might Be Giants

·        Radiohead

·        Green Day

·        Tool

·        Rage Against the Machine

·        Marilyn Manson

·        Nine Inch Nails

·        Weezer

·        Smash Mouth

·        Dethklok

·        Eminem

·        The Smashing Pumpkins

·        Les Claypool

·        Billy Corgan

·        Rivers Cuomo

·        Thom Yorke

·        Blur

·        Gorillaz

·        Garbage

·        Reel Big Fish

·        Goldfinger

·        Less Than Jake

·        Harvey Danger

·        Semisonic

·        Fatboy Slim

·        Cannibal Corpse

·        Slipknot

·        Kid Rock

·        Limp Bizkit

·        Bloodhound Gang

·        Beastie Boys

·        DJ Shadow

·        U.N.K.L.E.

·        Psyche Origami

·        Linkin Park

·        Sugar Ray

·        Marcy Playground

·        Soul Coughing

·        Eels

·        Lemon Demon

·        Jonathan Coulton

·        The Prodigy

·        Sum 41

·        Good Charlotte

·        The Aquabats

·        My Chemical Romance

·        A Perfect Circle

·        Barenaked Ladies

·        Andrew WK

·        Asian Kung Fu Generation

·        Flow

·        Hyde

·        Knot Lamp

·        The Orange County Supertones

·        The Pie Tasters

·        Skinny Puppy

·        Sneaker Pimps

·        Drowning Pool

·        Gin Blossoms

·        Matchbox Twenty

·        Counting Crows

·        Hootie and the Blowfish

·        The Cardigans

·        Alanis Morissette

·        Larc En Ciel

·        Coldplay

·        Fun Lovin Criminals

·        Cake

·        Metallica

·        Mighty Mighty Bostones

·        Mindless Self-Indulgence

·        Quarashi

·        Slayer

·        Seal

·        Sixpence None The Richer

·        Danny Elfman

·        Oingo Boingo

·        Tenacious D

·        Blink 182

·        Mustard Plug

·        Stone Sour

·        Unwritten Law

·        Third Eye Blind